Fall is always a bittersweet time of year for me. Each year, the end of October marks the anniversary of the murder-suicide that changed the course of my life. (This year, it's eight.)
In fall, the days grow shorter, and the light of day is tempered by shadows. In some moments, it's easy to fall into darkness completely.
And yet, in marking this time, I feel a sense of comfort. Every October will be another October since the magnetism of my world shifted, just as every November ticks off the years since I refused to let that violence destroy me.
And as strange as it is, there is also comfort in recognizing others who have touched the rim of that same darkness, and chosen to turn their profound despair into beauty. My tremendously talented housemate and dear friend Melody Hirsch designed and constructed this jacket, inspired by the film Melancholia, to reach into the darkness and call it by its name.
So when she asked me to take her jacket into the woods on a hazy Thursday, and told me the story of its origin, of course I said yes.
The darknesses that have threatened to drag me down at various times in my life, and the current dark cloud are very different than what you've faced, but this post really makes me feel compelled to seek out the film Melancholia.
You write beautifully and thoughtfully. And I hope that your strength and dignity makes successive anniversaries a little easier.
The artwork in the post you linked to is very powerful. Thank you.
I've been reading your blog for a while now (2-3 years?), and yet, somehow, I feel like I've somehow missed these anniversaries. While I haven't been where you've been, I just wanted to let you know that your posts inspire, encourage, and sometimes give me the little push I've been needing. I love to see your blog pop up in my feed reader, no matter what you choose to write about, and I second what Miriana wrote - she stated it perfectly. Congratulations on your strength and your courage - you're helping more than you know, right in this moment.
Thank you so much for your kind comments. I'm so glad that my post (or posts) have been meaningful to you - your comments are incredibly meaningful to me.
The decision to talk about the hard stuff is one that I've given a lot of thought to, both now and over the years, and I so, so deeply appreciate your positive feedback on this post. Thank you.
Post a Comment